Monday, September 30, 2013

Been a long time, lonely, lonely time

So its been awhile since I have written and since my last post much has happened. I am not going to talk about most of it. I lost my dog Shadow in April and since then I have been missing him.

Last week I rescued two tabby kittens, Solomon and Gideon. Taking care of them for two days made me miss my Shadow even more.

I started thinking that, maybe, since I am not ready for another dog yet that I should get a plant.  I could take care of a plant and it's not expensive. I could give it water, nutrients, sunshine, and talk to it like I used to talk to my dog.

I would say, "Hey plant, how are you today?"

The plant would say, "I have a name, you know."

"Really?" I would say. And then the plant would tell me its name is Susan or Bob or George or Paris Hilton or Dale Earnhardt Jr.

I would say, "Well George don't die on me like all my other plants have."

George would ask,"What did you do to the others?!?!"

I would be defensive,"Nothing! Sheesh, I mean I watered them and gave them sunshine. I don't know what happened!"

George would question me, "Did you water them too much or too little?"

"I don't know all of you are different and I just don't know what to do." I would say.

"All of us?" George would say, totally offended. "I am not a tree or shrub, I am a unique plant you know."

I would apologize. "George I am sorry, you are right. You are your own plant."

George would ask me,"What are you going to do to make things better this time?"

"I will research your unique plant type and try to give you the best soil, I will water you and make sure you get the best sunshine." I am hoping George will agree.

"That's good for starters," George says. And then George gives a list of special things he requires:  Maroon 5 playing in the afternoon, I can't talk to him about girlie stuff, he wants only west facing sun, he says to never leave dishes on the counter near him, and not to speak to him before 9am because he is not a morning person.

I say, "Your being outrageous."

George says,"That's the way it is, if you don't like it too bad."

And at this point I put the plant back on the palette at Home Depot and walk away.

Maybe I will get a Beta Fish in a bowl....yeah that's not too much effort right?